


Can We Keep Him?

by Forever_Sweet



Category: Gravity Falls
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-12
Updated: 2015-08-12
Packaged: 2018-04-14 07:35:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,314
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4556205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Forever_Sweet/pseuds/Forever_Sweet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bill is not as evil as first implied and Dipper is a little disappointed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Can We Keep Him?

When Bill had revealed his master plan to make a body, Dipper had honestly been expecting more fire and brimstone. He hadn’t been expecting a short and plump demon in a body he could barely use.

“Bill, do you need…help?” Dipper only offered because he was starting to feel bad just watching Bill wiggle around on the ground helplessly. Bill, however, did not seem worried about his current predicament and just kept wiggling.

“Naw! I’m starting to get the hang of this! Look, I even wiggled a toe!” Dipper directed his attention down to Bill’s feet, which were indeed wiggling aggressively.

“Ooookay. Glad you are enjoying yourself?” Dipper was out of things to say and this whole situation was just too weird. Shuffling some dirt around with his feet, Dipper glanced up at the dark and angry clouds in the sky.

Looking back at Bill, Dipper was impressed to see the demon had managed to sit up. Large yellow slitted-eyes were staring up at him with glee as the demon lifted one arm and let it fall back down.

“Wow, human bodies feel so weird! This is way different than when I possessed you before!”

“Bill, that was fourteen years ago. I’m surprised you actually remember back that far.” Everything about this was insane and Dipper was starting to think Bill’s crazy was rubbing off on him. Here he was standing in the middle of a clearing and watching his immortal enemy start stretching out his limbs.

“Oh, I remember-”

“Lots of things. I know, Bill.” Rolling his eyes, Dipper pushed more dirt around and shoved his hands into his pockets.

Seeing as Bill was not being a threat at this moment and the wind had picked up considerably. Dipper made the decision to start heading back to his car, ignoring the confused calling of ‘Pine Tree’ as he climbed into the driver’s seat.

He had just gotten the car started up when Bill opened the passenger door and slid into the seat. The demon laughing as he flopped down uselessly into the faded leather. Ignoring Dipper’s incredulous staring he shut the door behind him and buckled himself in. Only then did he finally pay Dipper any mind.

“Are you going to drive or not, Pine Tree?”

“Bill, what the fuck do you think you’re doing…?”

“I’m going home with you of course! I want to see if what Mabel is cooking is any good on this human body or if it will explode!”

“Wait a minute, you’ll call Mabel by her first name, but you always call me the dumb 'Pine Tree’, shit?”

“Them’s the break kid. So let’s get this show on the road!”

“I’m not going anywhere until you get out of my car.” Shutting off the engine, Dipper crossed his arms and twisted in his seat until he was facing Bill. The demon pouted and mimicked Dipper in crossing his arms.

“I’m pretty patient kid, I can wait here all day!” He crowed and smirked with confidence. Dipper simply rose an eyebrow and settled back into his seat to watch the rain coming down in a light trickle.

Soon enough Dipper could feel the car shake subtly as Bill bounced his knee impatiently. Out of the corner of his eye, Dipper could see the demon was biting his lip and glancing over at Dipper every few seconds.

“Fine! Whatever!” Dipper could feel himself glowing with victory as Bill stumbled out of the car, but he kept a neutral expression until he had the car started. Then he was driving back towards the Mystery Shack, leaving Bill scowling at him in the rear-view mirror.

Dipper had gotten back to the shack just before the rain started coming down heavily. It was a miracle he managed not to get soaked as he shoved his shoes off at the door way and called out that he was home.

Heading towards the kitchen he was greeted with the horrible sight of Mabel trying to cook. There was glitter sprayed all over the counter and something smelled like it was being burned alive.

“Hey, Dipper! Check out these new glitter cookies I made!” Dipper didn’t get so much as a word in before a cookie was shoved into his mouth. As he swallowed he hoped that glitter couldn’t cut the lining of the stomach.

“How’s it taste?”

“Like all my hopes of ever living healthy and glitter-free flew out the window.” For his snarky comment he was rewarded a huff and a smack on the shoulder.

“Where are the Stan’s?”

“They went out on a fishing trip a few minutes ago.” Dipper raised an eyebrow at the rain that was coming down hard outside the shack. If the Stan’s were outside then he hoped that they really weren’t going to attempt to fish in this weather.

“How did the whole throwing off Bill’s game plan, go?”

“I failed, he got his human body.” Mabel stilled in rolling out more dough as she turned wide-eyed to Dipper.

“Woah, what?! Is he going to, like, take over the world now? Did he hurt you anywhere?” Mabel poked at his side and he stifled a giggle, stepping away as he cleared his throat.

“Actually, he tried to come back with me to shack.”

“Really? That’s….very un-Bill like and not so evil.” Dipper shrugged and absently ate another cookie, his face scrunching up as he did.

“So, what did you do?”

“I left him out in the rain.”

“Woah, you went totally romantic movie on him. First you leave him in the rain and then you sweep him off his feet later!” She exclaimed with stars in her eyes and Dipper knew he had to put a stop to this fantasy immediately before it got out of hand.

“Two things wrong with that: he’s evil and a corn chip.”

“Not so much of a corn chip anymore~! What did his body look like anyway? Was he hot~?” Mabel winked and nudged at Dipper’s side with her elbow. Rolling his eyes, Dipper stole a few of the non-glittered cookies and went to sit at the table with them.

“Not so much hot. He was pretty cute though.”

“Aw…I always thought he would look sophisticated and smooth as a human! I even did some drawings when we were kids!”

“I’m not even going to ask about those so called drawings, but yeah he wasn’t smooth at all. In fact he got really excited over moving his toes.” Taking a bite out of a cookie, Dipper almost choked at the annoying voice that sounded from the kitchen doorway.

“You try being bombarded with gravity after centuries without it and see how well you do on operating one of these meatsacks, Pine Tree!” Dipper stared in bewilderment, confused as to how Bill could have even gotten into the house. Mabel on the other hand had that look in her eyes again and Dipper knew well enough to cover his ears before she started squealing loudly.

“Omg! Dipper! You were so right, he is adorable!” Cupping her hands over her mouth, Mabel jumped in place as she stared at the again pouting Bill.

“So, Mabel! Willing to part with one of those shiny monstrosities?” Mabel giggled loudly and set down the try of glitter cookies without a fuss. Turning to grin proudly at Dipper as Bill ate the cookies with approving hums and 'ooo’s.

“Dipper. Bro-bro. Dippingsauce.” Mabel got progressively closer until both of her hands were on Dipper’s cheeks, squishing some of the ingredients from the cookies onto his skin.

“What, Mabel?” He knew he would regret asking as Mabel leaned in close until the tips of their noses were touching. Her face seemed to be stuck in a mischievous grin and he silently hoped that whatever she was about to ask would be within reason.

“Can we keep him?”


End file.
